I am so very grateful to my Heavenly Father for constant reminders and lessons that seem to pull me in the direction I need (and desire) to go, if I am, but, attentive to these lessons. Although I often wish I didn't need to learn so much, I am grateful to have opportunities, I am grateful that the Lord hasn't given up on me. I also hope that I haven't missed out on too many others.
Lately, I have been given many opportunities to learn about LOVE. And, I've noticed that what I take away most from these lessons is usually one simple question I ask myself, "Why didn't I think to do that?" Not in a being-hard-on-myself kind of a way, but in a kindly kick-in-the-pants-because-you-CAN-be-like-that-if-you-want-to-be kind of a way.
My prayer is that by being more mindful of the GREAT examples all around me, and through constant petitions to my Father in Heaven, perhaps I will grow more compassionate and intuitive to the needs around me.
For example, I have a sweet friend who found out that one of her friends was having a REALLY bad day (due to a telling Facebook post). So, my friend called her up, took her for a pedicure and then they went to one of the Twilight movies. I didn't even find out about this through her, but word gets around (ok- my husband does share some good information with me whenever he can) and I was moved by her ACTION. She was aware of the need because she was checking up on this friend of hers, and she put a plan into play rather quickly. Such an easy, fun thing to do, but full of benefit for not just those two friends, but anyone else blessed to become aware of this act of kindness.
Another example is a neighbor of mine, but I don't even know which one. This neighbor saves her change all year long and finds a home for it each Christmas. She very thoughtfully and prayerfully considers who she should pass this change on to each year and then gives it with great love. What I love most about this is that I have lived here for YEARS and never even knew about it, and I still don't know which neighbor of mine does this. And I don't want to know, I am just grateful to have that good example to learn from. To know that there are so many out there (right around me) who are thinking of ways that they can be a kind and loving brother or sister to those around them.
There is another situation that I need to share, but this one is kind of difficult because I really think that this should have been me. I was given such a clear opportunity to serve, but I just didn't have my mind or heart in the place it needed to be in order to be an instrument in the Lord's hands. I hope that I will be ready for any other times when I find myself in a similar situation, I hope my heart will be open and my mind quick, and my body able to act. For now, however, I have to be grateful that I was, at least, a witness to the kindness that another offered when I was too blind to see.
This happened a few months ago as I was finishing up a shopping trip to the thrift store. I had picked up a few great finds and was checking out, with my two little boys - who by now were on the energetic side. I placed my items on the counter and started rummaging through my purse for a payment method. As I was completing the transaction, I noticed that a lady approached the person behind me in line. This lady (angel) very quietly told the mom behind me to have her kids go over to the rack of costumes and pick out one each and she would pay for it.
As I looked at this mom behind me in line I could see that she had a handful of small children and it looked as though their means were very meager. Halloween was just a few days away and I can imagine she was probably spinning her wheels trying to figure out what to do for her kids. But purchasing from the thrift store even was not in their budget.
This is the painful part, while I was conducting my own transaction, I overheard her talking to her daughter. Her daughter was asking what they would do for Halloween costumes and if they could go and pick some out from the rack nearby and if they would be able to find a Snow White costume for her. This mom, with such a sweet, patient, enthusiastic voice just said to her daughter that they would just have to be creative and find things around the house for their costumes.
Although my ears heard all of this, it never really got to my heart until after the fact, until it was too late for me to do anything. Busy in my own little details, I unknowingly shuffled all of that to the side, and kept on with my business.
Thank heavens another lady had her eyes, ears and heart open. I watched as the mom instructed her children to go over and pick out costumes. I felt the earth shake from their enthusiasm and joy as they flew over to the racks and started choosing their costumes. I saw the thankful look in the eyes of the mom as she spoke with this passing lady and I saw that this particular lady wasn't doing anything too out of the ordinary, this seemed like a simple, easy, normal part of her day.
Then I gathered up my bags and my boys and went out to my car and cried.
Why hadn't I listened to the words I heard? Why hadn't I acted on the knowledge I had been given?
I thought of the beautiful Snow White dress I made for my daughter a few years ago, now sitting in an old costume box at home. It was the perfect size for that little girl behind me in line. We have no use for it anymore, it could have been passed on to her with very little effort.
And, I could have spent the money to buy a few more costumes, that wouldn't have been a problem for our budget.
I was beating myself over the head with so many would haves and should haves ... tears were falling quite freely now and I felt like a shriveled old raisin. Not a very happy thing.
Thankfully, the Lord got through to me and helped me see a little more of the situation. He helped me to see the example of that wonderful lady who stepped up to meet this need. I very well could have walked out of those doors none the wiser to the entire situation. Instead, He made sure I could witness such a kind act and learn from it. He wants for me to be that kind-hearted, intuitive person that I so badly want to become.
He provided a great learning experience and provoked in me an even greater desire to become that person that I know is somewhere down inside of me.
So, these lessons are all etched in my heart and I am becoming more and more aware of the beautiful acts around me. And bit by bit, I hope to grow up to be just like them.
