I am going to admit something in this post, something that you probably already know about me, but I don't often say it out loud. This is something that perfectly clarifies the overall "nerd" that I am.
I love going to church.
I always have.
Even as a kid, a teenager, I loved it. My mom never had to drag me out of bed for Sunday (although there was that year when we had late church and I was racing to get home in time for 21 Jump Street - not my finest moment). I just always wanted to be there, I always enjoyed learning about spiritual things, I loved sharing testimonies and singing hymns. It all brings so much joy and peace into my life.
That being said, last week I realized my little baby isn't so little and neither are his sounds. After a few minor interruptions in Relief Society I realized it was probably best for everyone if I just went out to the hall with him. I started pacing around with him, feeling a little irritated that this was probably the beginning of me not going to class anymore for a while. It would probably be another year before I would be able to go back to class and sit peacefully through lessons again.
I wasn't very happy about all of this. I was bothered and felt like I was missing out on something.
Right then, I had a wonderful comfort come to my heart. As I held my little one, I realized that I had another year to just hold him and squeeze him and watch him and kiss him and cuddle him and, well, all that wonderful stuff moms just can't seem to get enough of. It is very likely that this is our last baby, so to be able to prolong every single moment I get with him is a gift straight from heaven.
I might be missing out on a lesson, but I would rather not miss out on my baby. I am so grateful for the beautiful children Heavenly Father has sent my way. They are so precious and perfect. I wish I had been more aware of how important these little moments with them would end up being to me. I am glad, however, that I was finally able to recognize the importance of this time before it was over.
I have years and years full of Relief Society and Sunday School lessons. But my baby years are almost up and when they are done, they are done. This is my big clue to enjoy the NOW.
It is so beautiful, afterall.
